Rules of Play

In my spaces, these are the rules of interaction:

All conversations held during my gatherings are confidential which means that the conversations of others are not to be repeated outside of the space.

Use only “I” statements. Speak for yourself rather than others or in generalizations.

Sharing is important, but proving is not the object of this dinner. Instead, it’s about listening. Listening to ourselves and to another’s perspective whether we agree with it or not.

So I ask that you truly listen– NOT JUST TO RESPOND – your need to be understood may often resolve because you can see their point and understand how it changes the story you’re telling may be adjusted. Richness and sacredness comes from understanding how someone got to where they are – not agreement or disagreement, but understanding their journey and perspective.  (paraphrase of Sean White’s insta post of 6/14/26) “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care” – John Maxwell

Sharing vulnerably can be super healing, but do it ONLY when it’s right for you. If you’re going to feel worried about what you shared afterwards, then it may be too soon. If you are going to feel lighter, more seen afterwards, then you may be ready. The choice is always yours.

When others are sharing, do not suggest solutions for them or treat them as if they are unable to help themselves. Your job is to practice seeing them as capable and perhaps ask a question or two to help them see it too. Everyone contains within them the unique wisdom required for their healing and this is different from yours or mine.

If you are feeling not enough or out of place, make the choice to understand and accept yourself as worthy anyway, knowing that you may simply have a new perspective to bring.

Be patient. Sometimes things that seem like one step in the physical world are actually 10,000 steps in the unconscious realm. We are healing our lineages seven generations forward and back.

The spaces I hold I’ve learned from my experience, and your spaces and teachings you hold from yours.

Incremental change can be quiet and look as simple as a new thought. New thoughts can your tradjust your trajectory for a lifetime. Notice that. Do not downplay it as inconsequential. Often only bone shaking activity is recognized as growth. Instead notice these quiet, powerful adjustments. They hold the power and beauty of flowers blooming.